A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.  
Proverbs 15:1 ESV  

In college, I took an improvisation acting class. One day, the professor told us to act out one phrase in a variety of ways. I can’t remember the exact line, but let’s use the phrase “You’re awesome” for example. I spoke with two differing mannerisms:  

  1. “You’re awesome!” (open smile, eyebrows raised, high-pitched voice) as if I’m congratulating my bestie on landing her dream job.  
     

  1. “You’re awesome .  .  .” (frown, eye roll, low-pitched voice) as if I’m validating my husband for taking out the trash even though I asked him forty-five times.  

This assignment proved it’s not what we say but how we say it that matters—both on stage and in life.  

Recently, I read a profound story in the book of Luke, and it paralleled the lesson I learned in acting class. In summary, the story goes like this:  

The angel Gabriel told Zechariah he’d have a son. Zechariah replied, “But how can this happen?  My wife and I are old.” The angel Gabriel chastised Zechariah for his faithless response and made him mute. The angel Gabriel told Mary she’d have a son. Mary replied, “But how can this happen? I am a virgin.” The angel Gabriel did not chastise her; instead, he gently explained how it would happen. 

 Zechariah and Mary spoke nearly identical verbiage, but they had two very different outcomes. Knowing Mary’s character, we can accurately assume her heart was in the right place. However, Zechariah was probably being a little snarky. The Bible says out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks. Yes, our words matter, but the heart behind our words matters most.  

Maybe we’re clueless as to how we come across sometimes—and we continue to struggle in personal and professional relationships. We must be honest with ourselves if our communication isn’t working! Do our words come from a place of anger, jealousy, bitterness, or pride? Do our comments reflect an attitude of grumbling, complaining, or negativity?  

A contrite spirit will lead to Christlike communication. When our hearts and our words align with Jesus, it leads to favor with both God and man—and that will bring a confidence that changes everything!  

God, I want my heart and words to look and sound more like You. Amen. 

 

This is an excerpt from A Confidence That Changes Everything: Devotions to Shine Bright in This Topsy-Turvy Life, the new book by Hannah Crews!